Picture the scene: The party is winding down, only the friends in your immediate circle are present except for a few socially inept morons who haven’t realized they’ve overstayed their welcome, you’re on the sofa, just coming down off whatever you snorted or swallowed or drank hours ago and you’re chatting to a friend who is a girl and the conversation is getting deep. Not meaning of life deep, but more like ‘I’ve never felt this comfortable to talk about my insecurities’ deep.  Then the ‘I always have found you attractive’ lines start getting thrown around and like balm to chafing thighs, you eat it up.  Before you know it you are fucking. Yeah, way to go mate.

Unless you are planning on turning your friend who is a girl into your girlfriend then I suggest you keep your nacho out of her salsa.  This is going to end badly and you know it. OF COURSE it seems like a good idea at the time! You were drunk/high/horny for fuck’s sake.  If I said it once I’ve said it a thousand times, girls are only capable of one night stands with someone they a) will never see again, b) have no way of contacting and c) someone who is hot but a complete imbecile…even that last one is a bit touch and go.

So if the two of you have a ‘connection’ on a friendship level and then you have sex WELL GUESS WHAT?  She is going to want more. Of course she will deny it and act like it was nothing but if you get on well, the sex was good, you feel comfortable with each other then hey! Why aren’t you together?  She will torture herself with this question for ages.  Do you consider her a friend? Why would you put her through this hmm? Why?! And last but not least, it’s pretty God damn selfish.  Mainly for all the people who are friends with both of you drunken geniuses.  Talk about awkward!  What if it all turns ugly and you guys can’t hang out any more because shit got weird?  Now everyone has to be strategic about inviting people to things and everything becomes complicated.  Thanks for ruining everyone’s life, asshole.

Sure it is normal to have sexual tension with your friends of the opposite sex.  But often and if not most of the time, it is that very tension that makes you friends.  It is the glue that holds everything together, the very thing that makes hanging out with one another fun.  Act on it and the tension turns into anxiety. Yay! Now a simple text has ‘meaning’ where as the day before it was just a text from a mate.  So unless you are absolutely smitten and really want to give it go, I urge you, my dear, to not shit where you eat.